today might be the first day we didn’t have visitors.  i thought i should probably post one of the MANY client shoots i have yet to share.  and i started to,  but then somehow i ended up doing this instead and i’m actually okay with that

today you are 20 days old.  i won’t say 3 weeks because that just sounds too old.

goodbye August.  thank you for teaching me to slow down, accept help from others and just breathe.

p.s. thank you for all the amazing support you all have given us!  the gifts and meals and kind words and lovin’ mean more than you know.

oh, p.s. i take it back.  the cowlick is tied for favorite with those wrinkles right there above his right eye.  he does his daddy’s signature sarcastic eyebrow raise so much that those lines are still visible even when he’s relaxed.

happy two week birthday “mister”.  you are so so loved.

all my love sweet boy.  xoxoxo.  and one more x.

sensitively trying to hold back a smile she says to me, “mama, i’m not your baby anymore.”  maybe to her, losing top teeth was the deadline.  i’m not sure where it came from but i wasn’t having it. 

“what do you mean you aren’t my baby anymore?  you promised you would ALWAYS ALWAYS be my baby,” i replied, followed by my guilt inducing puppy dog face {which i learned from her}.

“ok mama, i’m kind of your baby… but i’m big now.  no, i can’t be your baby.” 

i responded with funny melodramatic fake crying which of course was my comedic cover up for mixed emotions, ranging from pride that my girl is so smart and grown to sincere heartbreak that she didn’t want to be the baby.  i wasn’t having more babies. and besides, a deal is a deal  we went back and forth, with her giving in to be my baby, then taking it back as her sensitive heart got to her…giving in again as she saw she could use it to bribe me {i’ll be your baby if i can have another cookie} to finally deciding that independence tasted even better.

in curious retrospect, i wonder if this moment was God preparing my heart for our suprise baby to be.  or maybe this moment was the motivation for my ovaries to spring into action and fight past our birth control that had worked for 7 years.  either way, she AND briella will always be my babies, whether they embrace it or not.  of course a mama is happy that her girls are healthy and confident, and to be needed all over again by a new baby on the way helps ease the sting.  now let us all pray for the new baby who will be smothered by me AND it’s two shorter mom/sisters who are exuding maternal instinct and excitement from their pores as we speak.  poor child may never learn to walk.

for now, let me brag shamelessly on my 7 year old.  as you may or may not be aware, my girls got burned out on having the camera in their faces pretty quickly.  as i went pro, they became pro at dodging my lens no matter how sly i thought i was.  in the case that i was relentless {for example, i HAVE to at LEAST do their birthday shoots} they became expert negotiators.  negotiations for the following shoot lasted 5 weeks.  so to be precise, here is my 7.1 year old. funny how her usual whine of “stop takin my pitchurrrr” turned into a hambone’s “what about this pose?!  hey mom look at this…”  hollywood vogue-ing ensued.  i was pleasantly shocked and clicked away before it passed. 
oh.my.gosh. seven is full of unapologetic vigor.  unjaded confidence.

brooklynne is my sensitive thinker.  it’s like i can actual see the wheels in her head turning sometimes.

she is part tae-kwon-do super hero, part girly girl.  sugar and spice as they say.

ask and she will tell boldly educate you, “tae-kwon-do means the way of the hand and the foot”.  she says so in THE cutest lispy voice that has ever uttered those words. ever. i check my facts on the internet. 

she also will complain about the silly no hat rule at school and say, “but i’m a fashion guhll” in the way that those who can’t quite pronounce R’s say ‘girl’.

my heart jumped when this one ↑ came onto my editing screen.  how old is she??!  i think she looks just like me!  {please don’t shoot my self-esteem w contrary opinions here.  i know she favors daddy but if i can dream of being a fraction this beautiful it’s gonna be a good weekend} what? {seriously guys, she has my eyes and none of you can take that away from me!}

mmm hmmm.  this is what teeth look like when you are seven.  and proud!  can you keep that healthy self image please?  thanks.

sweet pea grin.  you can’t fool me.  you’re not all the way grown up yet.

how about we tone it down a bit so i can be sure you are still my baby little little girl.  insert innocent playtime with american girl doll.

she IS the self-proclaimed “funny one in the fam-i-leee” so let’s hope she doesn’t lose her sense of humor about this next one at her wedding slideshow.

model time ↑

and

 i don’t like this hat or hair and i’m done time ↓

↓ mama’s favorite ↓

↓ daddy’s favorite ↓

↓ sister’s favorite ↓

and brooklynne’s favorite ↓.  this was actually a strict part of her negotiation.  she spent half the shoot asking, “now can i do the pic of me and juliet’s feet??”  hilarious.  someone seems to have picked up on the newborn+family foot shot trend.  color me proud. 

thanks for letting me be THAT annoying mom who thinks her kids are the greatest today.  i will return to my regularly scheduled obsession over how adorable yours are with the next post.  have a fabulous weekend!!

we snuck away for a few shots with just mom and dad with their only girl

and then i got to play legos with the boys while sister got nice and sleepy

i was so happy to finally meet evie and her gang.  can’t wait to chase them all outside when it gets nice and warm.  thanks to all clare’s friends that gifted her this session.  super sweet, and it was a special treat for me too!

that last image will be great for gift certificates.  which, by the way, you should all be evangelizing to your friends for me huh?   they make great group baby shower gifts and i would love to be booked up with newborns for these slow cold winter months.  and… we happened to find out the day after christmas that WE WILL BE GETTING OUR VERY OWN BD NEWBORN {!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!}  so i’ve decided to keep my 2010 price, at least through January, in hopes of having a strong first quarter.  who knows what the second half of 2011 and my maternity leave will look like so i gotta work it now! 

a HUGE thank you to my awesome clients,  loyal blog readers and BD fans for an amazing 2010.  your kind words and encouragement mean more to me than you know.  i love that i constantly meet new amazing people, i love that you share special moments of your lives with me and i love that you get as excited about your images as i do.  thank you for being a unique extension of my ever growing family, and thank you for your continued support, sharing my site with anyone you think might wanna book at the 2010 rate while i’m still available.

  but, i’ve been sitting on some shoots for a while.  shoots that mix my personal life with my professional one, and i don’t know why i’ve hesitated to share them.  maybe i’d like to keep some bit of privacy, or maybe i’m unsure of the pics.  i don’t believe i know how to be unbiased and choose my best work when the subjects are my world.  but today is the day of giving thanks, and so i suppose there’s no time like the present to share these.  my girls and the impact they have had on my life,  i’m SO thankful for.

SO thankful for mini BD #1.i’m thankful that she is artsy fartsy.  that she’s the quiet one in a crowded room but a major goofball at home.

i’m thankful that she’s not always a meanie butt to her sister.

i’m thankful that some people still think she’s my twin, even if daddy is getting some credit these days.

i’m thankful that when she is well fed and well rested, we get along beautifully.  she’s got the heart of an angel.

i’m thankful we are so much alike, except for that part where we are both wretched unrecognizable groucho versions of ourselves in the morning.

i’m thankful that she’s not nearly as close to being a teenager as this omen of an image tries to warn me she is. 

i’m thankful that she still wants her hair cut like this, otherwise i might have to get some guts and finally cut mine.

i’m thankful for her wrinkle nose smiles and the fact that the sun still makes her sneeze, just like when she was a baby.

i’m thankful that she could be a model but she has no interest.  the longer she stays unaware of the power of her ravishing beauty, the better for daddy’s sanity and mine.

SO thankful for mini BD #2i’m thankful that i can occassionally still get her to wear piggytails, tho’ typically this is the result.

 i’m thankful that letting her take them out buys me 7 mins of cooperative photo shooting from the girl who always says “stop takin’ my pitchuhhh!”.

 i’m thankful for the good little citizen who makes cute friends who make her cute friendship bracelets.

i’m thankful that if nothing else, she has my eyes and i can put “green eyes” by coldplay on and sing it loudly to make her blush.

i’m thankful that i will always hear her darling 6yr old giggle when i look at this one.  and remember her top baby front teeth- one of which has been repossessed by the tooth fairy since this shoot.

  i’m thankful that she’s a tough one, or thinks she is, always eager to wrestle someone.  it’s currently her favorite form of affection.

i’m thankful that she has such an amazing sense of humor.  that she’s the self named “funny one in the family”.  that when i make a teasing comment about her that should go over her head, she catches it, makes this astounded face, and then quick as lightning jabs back at me with something more witty and hilarious.

i’m thankful that she’s a thinker.  it’s a little scary because i don’t have all the answers she demands, but maybe we will get there together.

  i’m thankful for moments like these.  when she’s still my “wittle baby wif a thilly withp”.  that her R’s don’t always come out “vvwight” and she still wants me to carry her.  these are my comforts as she tries to renegotiate that promise to always be my baby.  “but mom, i’m not a baby now, i’m a kid”

i’m extremely thankful that they have each other.  so much so that i remind them how lucky they are, and how much they should appreciate each other… to the point of their annoyance with my meddling.  when left alone, they get along brilliantly.  briella can’t help but be a perfectly overbearing substitute in my absence.   and brooklynne…well i’d say she does everything the little sister is supposed to do, be that good or bad ;)  the moments i savor most are the ones where they have escaped, just the two of them, to their own magical world where they think no one is listening.  but of course i am and what i overhear is exactly the trust and comfort that i hope they will always find in each other.

   finally, i’m thankful that even tho’ they run circles around me, i get the chance to try to keep up.  what more could a mama ask for?

 at age 12 i really did learn a lot.  sleepless nights pacing the floor with a crying baby.  birthday cakes for a one year old covered in chicken pox.  blondie curls, gap teeth and upside-down heart shaped sunglasses that melted hearts.  as a scrawny pre-teen i popped her up on my undeveloped hip and carried her around as my own.  the disappointed glares of assuming strangers never bothered me a bit.  if they thought i was her teen mom, i just took it as acknowledgement of the hard work i happily did to take care of my living doll, my baby, my first real wish come true. truth is, all that was the easy stuff.  i got my own family to deal with just in time to miss the rocky hormonal years.  our amazing mama got to take the full brunt of the era where you cry unexplicably and have no idea what’s best for you and you hate your mom because she does.  the hardest part for me is appreciating how much she has grown in the moments i missed.      i had always wanted a sister, but when i got her, the age gap made me her caretaker.  making the transition from big sister to peer sister has been a bit uphill.  just now we can share clothes and movies and experiences.  but it’s hard to watch your first baby deal with boys, or drive a sketchy car off into the night.  i imagine those are the times when a peer sister should be the one keeping your secrets and figuring out life with you.  instead i have to suppress my unsolicited advice and remind myself that i am not her mother.  {which by the way, she should be very very grateful for.  it gets no better than the mama we have.  it’s a shame that you can’t appreciate that sometimes until you become a mother yourself }  i’m fumbling my way thru’, taking it as a practice preview for when my life will consist of two teen daughters, and trying to force myself to be a teen with her again to make up for lost time.  it’s really not such a stretch   Lord knows i spent enough of my childhood trying to be an adult.  ironic that i spend my adulthood acting like a kid.  { i think i just had an epiphany!}  so when we get together now, it’s equal parts of intentional influence and immature nonsense.  one week i drag her along to a women’s growth group, the next we skinny dip in a public lake.  most days i roll my eyes as she is unnecessarily awkward and shy… i will have to wait for her to become comfortable in her own beautiful skin and gain confidence in her impressive intelligence.  meanwhile we laugh at inside jokes and her hilarious snorts that usually follow.our tradition of seasonal photo shoots has stood the test of time.  have to say tho’, this time felt more like two sisters on the same level having a blast than ever before.  through my lens this day, there was very little evidence of my baby.  i think i was finally able to see my sister.  it was a good day… hopefully the prototype for many more.  we shopped, ran around town trespassing for the sake of art, and shot til we {and the sun} dropped.  we even topped the day off with side by side pedicures. most astonishingly, she jumped into the leadership role, pulling me along when i uncharacteristically wanted to chicken out of shooting at this crazy artist’s house we spotted. great call. 

i heart you too Kaitlin Cherie.  i’m thankful for you, our story and the journey. 

xoxo,

Sissy

six months ago, gina was a stranger who called from her labor recovery room and {very sweetly} persisted that i come take pictures of her precious girl who had arrived way earlier than expected.  i was in a bit of a rough patch and resisted, but all my hesitations and excuses were met with more endearing persistence.  she made it easy on me and in the end i said yes. 

it was one of the best yes’s ever.i can’t explain the peace that comes from knowing things are not in your control, and that you are way better off because of it!  all sorts of happy-obvious-sarcastic things have happened, entangling our lives since then and it just makes me smile.  when my client gina asked if my girls could come along to the shoot, i was happy to oblige, excited that i wouldn’t have to leave them again.  when she asked if they could be in the shoot?  well that was something new…seemed like a huge crossing of boundaries, mixing of my two worlds. it just seemed foreign. and then, i said yes  sometimes you just stop following the rules and go with your heart.  and sometimes magic follows.    you see, my client gina is now also my dear friend gina, and along the way, our kids have become sweetly bonded.  it’s seriously the most innocent and heart-warming dynamic they share.still, it couldn’t hurt to have pics of them from the beginning if they do happen to grow up and get married or something so good bye to boundaries.  i believe in making the most out of everything, and if my photography journey is going to be an avenue to have incredible people hand delivered into my life, so be it.  gina’s story is one of many already, and i just want to say again, thank you.  to my Jesus, and to all of you who watch and support and encourage me.  to be surrounded by so many who rejoice when i rejoice and wait patiently when i stumble…  you are recognized and loved and appreciated. 

well, six months ago, you might say how gorgeous she is… how her energy for life is such a breath of fresh air…  what an infectious smile she has…  

personally i would say “there’s something about that girl that i love/we are gonna be good friends one day/i’m so glad my girls have her for an art teacher/she has such a fabulous name”

and today? 

you would say all those same things.  only you would say them with a different tone of sincerity and appreciation and awe.  today you know that bridget beatty has stage 2 breast cancer.

the smart, pretty, talented girl who has her first real job and her very own husband and a slew of pets to love on now has to take time out of her sweet little life to deal with this stupid thing called cancer.  and it’s tragic and it’s heartbreaking and it’s the most unfair.  but the greatest thing about bridget is that you spend 10 minutes with her, and she’s not the girl with cancer.  everything else about her shines so brightly that she makes having cancer seem like “i stubbed my toe earlier but it will be fine, now let’s go enjoy our day at the fair…”

my self and my girls and my church pray for her every single day.  but they aren’t desperate pleading prayers- mine at least… they are prayers of anticipation.  i’m really just curious to see how this cancer thing will be used in her life and the lives of those around her.  it sounds bold, but i’ve always had a sense of peace about it.  it’s why i felt completely comfortable saying to her from the beginning “i really don’t see this being more than a hiccup in your story”.  that’s not to make light of body-wrecking chemo, round after round.  or being a twenty-something and having your hairbrush be replaced by a lint roller.  or how it must feel to have to explain ”the news” over and over to friends and family and students and coworkers and curious people on the street.  i’m just saying, bridget is special and i’ve never seen cancer be used to spread such inspiration and positivity.  that’s not even a real word, but for her, it’s the perfect word.   

if you are lucky enough to know bridget,  you might want to know there will be a benefit for her:

October 16th {4pm}

Grandfather’s Barn

6901 Stillwell Beckett Road

Oxford, Ohio 

show her some support there, and whether you know her or not, show her some love here by comment if you’d like to.  i see on her FB wall that she touches the hearts of so many.  i can only imagine that it doesn’t hurt to be reminded that everyone is on your side.

  {for my beautiful friend who spells her name wrong  i adore you. -Bridgette}